 |
MELROSE
|
|
MELROSE
|
Luckily there was a temporary receptionist in my department who hailed from the Ozark Mountains. She had a tawngy, slow accent that would make Dolly Parton sound like a Yankee. In fact, she was a bit hard to understand which is probably why she didn't get a permanent position. Regardless, like most other co-workers I met in those first days, from the chairman to garage parking attendant, she had a poison ivy story to tell. She said that once she had had "the itch" so badly that her folks had to tie her hands to the bed posts to keep her from scratching herself to the bone. I understood the feeling. Their folk recipe that cured it was simple, and is still the only remedy I use today for any itches, not just poison ivy:
1 bottle of the cheapest rubbing alcohol
1 bottle of the cheapest aspirins - 100 count
Dump the aspirin into the alcohol and let it dissolve. Then apply liberally all over whatever itches. It works like a dream. The alcohol dries it and the aspirin numbs the pain. And, it dries powdery clear so your hands can help you make a good first impression. I've heard that you can always tell a lady by her hands, to which I'd like to add, and if she ever met this gal from the Ozarks who could cure anything for under two bucks.
August 5, 1998